Ballroom dancing is uniquely awesome at building chemistry with your beau. Where else can you work together in close contact, learning new things and new ways to connect, with an activity you can use virtually anywhere? All you have to do is follow a few simple rules along the way.
Consider Your Partner’s Enjoyment
There was one evening, when after trying to get a good dance for over an hour, I suddenly realized I’d been focusing entirely on my own moves at the expense of my partner. Once I checked in to make sure they actually enjoyed the steps I sent their way, the whole evening was transformed, and my partners and I both had a great time.
Leaders, when dancing with your partner, try to notice the little things, like if they’ve finished the last pattern before you swing them into the next, or if there’s certain steps they have trouble with. Followers, remember you can use gentle pressure to warn your partner of an impending collision, and never show off at their expense. They’ll appreciate you taking the time to let them have fun too.
Trust Your Partner
On a sailing vessel, there must be a both a lookout and a helmsman. Both roles are equally important, regardless of who actually steers, and no one can do both jobs alone. When dancing with your romantic partner, you must trust them to handle the half of the dance that doesn’t belong to you. That means no back-leading from the followers, and no leaders pushing their partners through moves. Every relationship is healthiest when neither person is doing all the work.
Match The Music
Like your romantic life, dancing is too much an art to be reduced to a series of cold, unfeeling variables. Use it to generate excitement, passion, and naughtier emotions by role playing characters together. For example, a marching tango might have you pretending to be cold and aloof, while secretly longing for each other. For a fast salsa, try winking and being flirtatious with your partner, like two Spanish lovers away on an exotic tryst.
Laugh It Off
Dancing – like romance – is often a chance to embrace your inner silliness, so welcome it with open arms (West Coast Swing is great for this!) Shelve your perfectionist side, and try making up a new move from time to time, even if you get a bit confused doing it. If you make a mistake, joke about it, or pretend you ‘meant’ to do it, and then let it go. No matter how frustrated you get, the dance has not beaten you if you hang on to your sense of humour!